If you can't tell this wonderful dog (or is it a cat? deer?) is first COVERED in glitter... Second... ummm FLOWERS for EYES? WHAA??? I really don't see in any world where flowers used for eyes is a good idea. OK, I take that back, the rose parade is allowed. Lastly, we must address the "collar" A piece of plastic plant as the collar? Plus the green of the collar completely clashes with the rest of the craft! Enjoy the horror!
What self respecting craft blog would be complete without the shell box? I will admit that as a child I LOVED things like this. I also loved collecting every single shell on the beach though. (I now feel bad for my parents for the rocks/shells I used to bring home... seriously what are you going to do with all of those things?) Really though, as an adult where could this possibly go in your house? What decor would match this work of art? I'd be afraid of poking myself anytime I picked it up. Quick someone call a doctor, cause the beach just threw up all over a perfectly fine box.
When I was in high school I refused to do any of the cutting and what not during biology. Not that I was "against" the whole thing or anything like that, I just don't do well with medical type stuff. I can't watch someone get a shot, I can't hear about someone's surgery (I don't know how I survived a c-section). Anyway, back to the craft at hand... PLEASE tell me this was a science project? Or perhaps a gift for that professor friend of yours that has everything. Either way, someone's got a sick sense of style!
So this particular craft caught my attention because well... have you SEEN it? There are so many things wrong with this... we'll have to start at the top. What kind of "hat" is that? It doesn't look like anything anyone would wear ever. Then the strange ribbon that wraps around not only the hat but the neck, waist AND hips. She looks like she's being burned at the stake by a variety of flowers with her hands tied behind her back. Totally how I want to celebrate 4th of July... or Bastille Day... you decide.
What do you do with your husbands ties? ....
make PANTIES of course! Cause during those intimate moments you know you want your husband to say, "hey, those remind me of your Grandpa's funeral!" Have you held a tie? They are usually made of pretty thick fabric. I just don't see how that could be comfortable to wear! So raid your husbands closet today and make yourself some intimate apparel from your husband's favorite tie! I'm sure he'll just love it.
As Lisa mentioned when she emailed this little craft to me, anything with the words "cute" and "skull" in the same description is a little bit suspect. The creator uses the word "cute" a little loosely I say. The reasons these are so wrong is first, if you are into skulls and bones and happy stuff like that, I'm almost positive you aren't browsing around for embroidered ones. So who is this marketed to? Don't even try and give me "Halloween" because no self respecting crafty person would be caught dead with these on their fridge (they are magnets) even if it is October.
Good thing this pen holder has some extra padding. I was nervous that it was going to harm itself, so luckily someone created a padded room for it. The other horrible thing about this puffy monstrosity is the color scheme... some parts look like a pattern, and then there is a random pink puff thrown into the orange row, or a green puff in the blue row? Not to mention the fact that the colors themselves are all sorts of wrong. Everyone knows that orange doesn't go with red! Yet, there they are right next to each other in all their clashing glory!
So, I've had this particular craft up my sleeve for a while now... I still can't quite figure out what it's supposed to be. My best guess is a plant, but really why would you ever want this prickly beast in your home? Do you hang your keys on it? Do you admire it's porcupine-like quills? It has NO PURPOSE, just to sit there in it's gold plated candy dish and look crazy.
Please tell me this is for a science project? Right? The only problem is I don't remember ever having projects like this for science or for health. So sadly this leads me to believe someone just wanted to make a uterus out of yarn. The REALLY sad thing is that the ovaries are missing. Couldn't you just make a couple little balls and attach them with a string? Was it that hard to actually complete the project? I mean, if you are going to make a uterus out of yarn you might as well go all the way, right?
Now if this was a little dress for a wee little girl it really wouldn't be that bad... but this dress is for soap. I don't know about you, but I think my soap is just soap. It does not need to be dressed. It has nothing to cover up. Most people have soap, it's not like you are hiding the fact that you ... GASP .... OWN SOAP! So I say, "put down the crochet needles, you've gone a little too far"
Really, I promise... YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW! Girls... I'll bet you can guess though! I just am curious who in their right mind would wear this... let alone MAKE it!! I mean really, there are just no words for this particular craft, except to cringe, and weep for the future.
Never again will the words "doggy bag" bring to your mind the image of a clean, white box in which to hold leftovers. These doggy bags must be for the dog owner who can't bear to throw anything away, even if that something used to hold dog chow, as it plainly states on the front of the bag. I'm not exactly sure what sort of function one would take this bag to and I hope that I never have to see this sort of bag used to hold anything except dog food. But then as every dog has his day so we must expect every dog chow bag will have it's day too. Perhaps a few rhinestones to brighten it up a bit?
The only thing that comes to my mind when I look at these is Rainbow Chicken Nuggets with eyes. Now I remember the whole "troll" phase with the creepy dolls with all the hair, but these poor little nuggets don't even have a full set of hair. Just created and already having male pattern baldness. Somehow they are all a little stoned too what with the dilated pupils and all. They must have needed a little something to take their mind off of going bald so early in life. Poor little nuggets.
Apparently these are pin cushions. Because when I think of pin cushions I think of giant EYES! Not that I didn't have eye issues before (because believe me I do, I can't even watch someone put contacts in!), but this is just compounding my eye issues to the nth degree. I think it takes a special sort of person to want to use these, like a voodoo witch doctor of some sort!
I don't care who you are, this particular craft has the power to give nightmares to parents AND children! What in the world could the purpose of this be? Why is it eating spaghetti? Why creepy monkey do you exist, WHY?
